Tuesday, June 29, 2004

Whos the bitch?

After reading what she wrote last nite, i have to say this.. NOBODY EXCEPT YOU THINKS YOU'RE A BITCH!!!! GET THAT IN YOUR BIG FAT HEAD!!!! I've told you time and again that I WILL react this way and that its just a passing phase but somehow, to you, you just cannot accept that... you expect the whole bloody world to move on just because you have... Well, all i can say is this... GROW UP!!!!! Nobody is ever the same... and here's the other thing, i never disassociated you with your frens or my frens... the fact that you know them as well clearly shows that they take you as frens as well... if you spend less bloody time only with your school frens and look around, you'll bloody realise that you have so many other frens around... its just that you never ever opened your bloody puney eyes to take a look around!!! So for crying out loud, stop trying to blame me for YOUR OWN FAULTS!!! Had enough of taking this shit.. I know you well enough, you'll probably tell me that i'm just trying to seek attention so that i will look like the victim here... Well, think about your own actions den? I didn't have to do anything to make myself the victim... You can prance around and tell the whole world that i destroyed the relationship but guess what, it takes 2 hands to clap and the whole world seems to know that except you!!!! honestly, just think about your own actions and your own thoughts... i might not always be right but i dun believe that i'm wrong either... at least i can touch my heart and say that i was 200% in the relationship... i spoke every other time i thought something was wrong... even if i was wrong... at least i cared enough to speak up... but you say all i did was make you feel worse.... Hmmm you know what, THE TRUTH HURTS!!!!! so live with it... Amazingly, if you can tell me to live ewith it, den why can't you? why do you have ti hide in a corner and keep to yourself, not being fair to anybody else? I'm not obligated you might say... well, if you really consider any of us as frens den thats your obligation... Anyway, just so that you can be happy and jump for joy, just want you to know, i ain't gonna cry another tear for you...i ain't gonna think another happy moment we had together... Cuz i realised something that i feel you are very wrong... That is that its not worth it!!! thats right... You're not worth it!!! after all the one and the half years we went through, if this is all you have to give den yes, you are definitely not worth it... Shame on me to think that you were mature for your age... i guess you proved me wrong again... If you feel unhappy about what i've said here... i dare you... Call me!!! trash it out...you wanna prove your point so badly den do it... no point hiding it anymore....I promise you i won't hold back... there's no bloody fucking point anymore!!!

Sunday, June 27, 2004

:P

Sometimes u wonder, what do u have to do to make people happy? u try to give them everything they want but at the end of the day, all they do is turn back to u and tell u 'nice knowing u, thanks for everything. BYE!!!' and slam those words right in your face... after that, they act as though they dun know you... you never exist in their thoughts, their vocab and their dictionary...unless of course they need your help... Why does that sound so familiar? I will neever forget her... no matter how she wants me to.. cuz i dun believe that i have been a very bad bf... fuck whateva!! it was all part and parcel of a relationship...and if that is taken into consideration, den i dun think i'm the only guilty party... maybe they are all right...maybe she is still growing... just really hope that one day she'll understand that the more you love a person, the harder it is to let go... the more you love someone, the more angry and frustrated u become... so much so that you run out of reactions that you have no choice but to walk away, so as to try to cool down... what she didn't understand was that... and a whole lot of other stuffs...well, fuck it... no point now...

Saturday, June 26, 2004

How angry?

should i be angry? i think i should... but i know there is no point for me to that.. cuz deep inside me, its only my initial reaction.. i need to blame someone, so i blame myself... i get ridiculed for that...Today, i finally realised that all this while, all the things that i was so against in life, things i though i would never ever do, i've done it... what does that leave me as? a piece of hypocritical shit that only talks cuz his mouth seems to be bigger than his ass and balls combined... i shudder at the thought of myself now... i have begun a small feeling of dispise for myself... and its gonna grow bigger every other day that i feel like this... Welcome to the world of the insanely ridiculas, fickle fucked druggy....

Thursday, June 24, 2004

ME!!!

i shall dedicate this blog to 3 people...me, myself and i!!! Muhahaha!!! basically for me to ramble my nonsense and evil thoughts compared to mi other blog where the more 'radio-friendly' thoughts will be placed....hehee